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Growing up with two moms: the untold story | LifeSiteNews.com
Growing up with two moms: the untold story | LifeSiteNews.com.
This is a long and very informative article by a man in his 40’s who lived with two mothers. He tells of his feelings, how he grew up, how he never learned the social skills of those who live with male and female parents and how difficult it has been to live in the “normal” world. Not because of his sexuality choices, but because his upbringing made him ‘abnormal’…his words, not mine. He calls himself different and weird and a social outcast because of his confusion as he grew up.
“My peers learned all the unwritten rules of decorum and body language in their homes; they understood what was appropriate to say in certain settings and what wasn’t; they learned both traditionally masculine and traditionally feminine social mechanisms.
I had no male figure at all to follow, and my mother and her partner were both unlike traditional fathers or traditional mothers. As a result, I had very few recognizable social cues to offer potential male or female friends, since I was neither confident nor sensitive to others. Thus I befriended people rarely and alienated others easily. Gay people who grew up in straight parents’ households may have struggled with their sexual orientation; but when it came to the vast social universe of adaptations not dealing with sexuality—how to act, how to speak, how to behave—they had the advantage of learning at home. Many gays don’t realize what a blessing it was to be reared in a traditional home.”
This article was an eye-opener and well worth reading.
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I have read the article, and have this to say: I grew up in a stable, traditional single-income American family and had many of the same socialization issues the writer relates.
In other words, the fact that there was a gay parental relationship is likely not the issue.
Crap parents are everywhere, and come in all types and sorts, GLBT, Straight, and so on.
You have a point. Many of us grew up in what I call disfunctional families with 2 parents. His perspective just sounded a lot different than what I went through in our ‘traditional but disfunctional’ family.
I have two Moms and I can relate. I know exactly what it is like to live in the gay world while longing to be part of a normal family. I wanted a Daddy. I still do. I spent a lot of time with a normal (for lack of a better word) family and there is a major difference. People are afraid to say the truth. But gay parents try hard and give a lot but no matter how much they do, they are not what I needed. I got what I needed from my best freinds family.
Just wanted to say to ‘blunt and cranky’ that you dont know. You really dont have any idea what it’s like cuz you did not grow up with two parents of the same gender. A son models his dad and if he doesnt have a dad then who does he model? Sure you had your own problems but at least there was a man and a woman who related in a normal (for lack of a better word) way. Two moms or two dads will have have one of them be kinda normal and the other one a really masculine woman or a really effeminite man. So you don’t know which one is the one YOU are supposed to be. Hope that makes sense.